How to survive prison
If it would help you to get some advice from me directly, please feel free to get in contact by email.
If you’re preparing for prison, I hope that this advice will he[p you to feel calmer. Here are my seven top tips for surviving prison…
The first thing to say is that, after all the stress of police arrests, interviews and court cases, actually going to prison was a huge relief for me. Believe it or not, I enjoyed almost every day of my time in prison. Follow these suggestions, and I think you’ll be absolutely fine.
1. Make friends, not enemies, but hold your boundaries.
Approach every person you meet as a fellow human being. Everyone, regardless of who they are, is a potential friend. For example, the person who attacked me later became someone I would stop and chat with. It’s also important to hold your boundaries, regarding your own privacy and what you want to do with your time. My personal choice was never to talk about the crimes that I committed that resulted in me going to prison. Whenever I was asked what my crime was I just said: “I don’t talk about that. It’s in the past now, and I don’t have any interest in other people’s crimes either.”
2. Build a relationship with the prison staff.
The prison staff can act like complete arse-holes, but try to remember that they have a challenging job, and receive very little training. In some other countries being a prison warden requires a university degree, with in-depth training to understand mental health, addiction, medical needs, autism, ADHD etc etc, but sadly in most countries wardens are completely un-equipped to work well with prisoners. Try to be patient with them, and let their verbal abuse and disrespectful attitude wash off you, like water off a duck’s back. Start every day afresh, without any bad feelings towards the staff.
3. Don’t buy things from other prisoners, and don’t buy things for other prisoners… ever.
Whatever the item is, make this a firm boundary. Vaping pods can become a currency in prison, and so are used to buy drugs. My advice is not to get involved in either. Most violence in prison is caused by people getting into debt. For the most part, if you can avoid debt you can avoid violence.
4. Keep learning.
Take every opportunity to learn. Sign up for educational courses as soon as you can. Ask friends and family to send you books that about topics that you want to learn about. This could be something you’ve studied in the past, or something that you’ve always been curious about but never taken the time to pursue. It could be anything from learning a new language, to studying for a new career; or simply crosswords and number puzzles.
5. Take a few useful practical items.
Take a printed list of friends and families phone numbers and addresses. As soon as you are able, make sure you do the prison admin needed to be able to call or write to people. For example, this may involve buying stamps, or filling in a form with names and contact details before you are able to call them. Take a few plastic or paper folders so that you can keep your letters and study material organised. Take pens, pencils, a rubber.
6. Prepare your finances.
Take cash to get you started, and arrange for a family member or friend to send you money regularly (using the prison’s system for this), so that you can buy stationary, snacks, toiletries and telephone time throughout your stay in prison.
7. Take up every opportunity presented to you.
– go to the gym
– sign to education classes
– arrange visits from friends and family
– play pool (if you can’t play, learn!), and take part in pool tournaments
– go to art classes
Follow these tips, and you’ll be able to make your time in prison productive, creative, friendly and even fun.